Songs of the Lost
by BananaBabe903
Summary: Song-fics for each goodbye scene or unrequited love scene, and plenty other angsty stuff in New Who and possibly some Old Who. Tissues included inside. Songs of lost companions, lost loves, and lost hope. The basic song-y summary to DW. T for safety.


**Ladies and gentlemen of , prepare yourself for pure angst. This will be a song-fic collection of Doctor Who stuff that I write purely about goodbyes, forbidden love, unrequited love, and so forth. :) These might be in chronological order (it'll be easier to read), so please if you have any suggestions for songs or scenes, don't be afraid to leave a review! :)**

**Song: "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again" from Phantom of the Opera**

**Scene: Post Doomsday (b4 Bad Wolf Bay meeting), the Doctor's POV**

**Disclaimer: I own not Doctor Who nor the song below, the BBC and Andrew Webber do!  
**_

* * *

You were once  
my one companion . . .  
you were all  
that mattered . . .  
_

The Doctor was something that no one could explain. Well, that no _human _could explain. There was nothing in this entire universe that the Doctor cared about after the war. Nothing could make him get out of bed in the morning, nothing could make him eat, nothing could make him smile again, why? Because he didn't want to. There was no use anymore.

Until Rose Marion Tyler.

He never expected himself to fall so hard, but now look where he was now… at the top of an endless hole, Rose at the very bottom—his love for her the shovel which he used to dig.

_You were once  
a friend and lover -  
then my world  
was shattered . . ._

She was gone. For all he knew, she might still be falling. She might be hitting the edge, hell, she might not even be breathing. All because of him.

Over a year she had been gone. He went back to his bed and sat. He didn't get up once to eat or drink. All he did was think—think about the terror and pain he had caused her, think about how he had lost his best friend, a lover, and a stranger all in one day. And not to mention millions of lives… all at his whip of the hand.

He never stopped wondering… what if other people out there when he pulled the switch when everything was sucked into the void… what if there were other time travelers or something out there that got sucked in as well? It was his fault. All his fault.

The Doctor's heart ached for Rose… his metabolism was stronger than an average human's, so he didn't need to eat or drink for a couple of months. And after ninth months about, he learned to ignore the hunger gnawing in his stomach and how dry his tongue tasted. Finally, he gathered his thoughts and made his way to the kitchen where he made himself a banana smoothie. And then he thought of something amazing… he might be able to communicate… was there a hole left in the universe, waiting to be patched up by say, a between-parallel-worlds communication device????

_Wishing you were  
somehow here again . . .  
wishing you were  
somehow near . . ._

As he was preparing these things, trying to find a teeny, tiny patch in the universe, he felt himself get drowsy. He closed his eyes for just a second when he reopened them again, and saw young Rose Tyler sitting in front of him, her legs criss-cross applesauce. She was about eighteen and her short hair was parted to the side. She wore a yellow jacket and blue jeans—one of her favorite outfits when she wasn't wearing that blue one.

The Doctor couldn't get himself to speak, so he sputtered some random noises that sounded like, "Gah, err, uhh…" Rose giggled.

"Hello, Doctor." She smiled at him, her lips closed. And then, the Doctor blinked and she was gone.

_Sometimes it seemed  
if I just dreamed,  
somehow you would  
be here . . .  
_

It was a dream. Or some really crazy hallucination. One way or another, the Doctor knew that he _had_ to, just _had _to see her one last time again to make sure she was safe… for his own sake.

He bloody loved her, and missed her like hell. He wanted to touch her one more time, to see her smile, to hear her voice… to wake up in the morning and hear her singing while she made herself an egg… but it was all gone. All the memories, all the emotion, all the love, like her, were gone.

_Wishing I could  
hear your voice again . . .  
knowing that I  
never would . . .  
Dreaming of you  
won't help me to do  
all that you dreamed  
I could . . .  
_

She had looked up to him—saw him as a hero. She never knew that he was the bad guy. Sure, if he had said it out loud, she would've thought he was quoting Edward Cullen and simply laughed. Darn, those line-stealing vampires!

Before the TARDIS left, he had to see, just had to see her grave. The tomb which she would never rest in. The TARDIS rocked back and forth, humming a song of mourning, for her Doctor.

He got out of the TARDIS and walked into the graveyard, walking up to the grave of Rose Marion Tyler. It read:

**Here Lies**

**Rose Marion Tyler**

**April 27, 1987-June 19, 2006**

**Daughter and girlfriend**

It broke the Doctor's heart as he read it. It was so, so… _generic. _Like it could've been anybody if they had just changed the name. It could've been absolutely _anybody_—it captured none of Rose's essence, none of her personality at all… it was grieving.

A crying angel stood over Rose's tombstone, mourning for the death of such a pretty, brilliant girl. It was too sad for Rose though—if she had really died, she would've insisted in her will that a smiling child looking up at the heavens would be her mark on the land.

_Passing bells  
and sculpted angels,  
cold and monumental,  
seem, for you,  
the wrong companions -  
you were warm and gentle . . ._

Their history was more powerful than the Doctor could ever imagine. Everything they had been through: werewolves, the end of the world, the undead, Satan, and of course, Daleks, Cybermen, parallel universes. Their history was more powerful than the history of the universe itself.

_Too many years  
fighting back tears . . .  
Why can't the past  
just die . . .?  
_

As he got the TARDIS ready for transmission afterwards, to get Rose's attention in the other parallel world in the teeny, tiny gap, he thought of how Rose had saved him. He would be dead, if not for her. Mentally and emotionally, that is, perhaps even physically as well.

Rose would want him to move on.

_Wishing you were  
somehow here again . . .  
knowing we must  
say goodbye . . .  
Try to forgive . . .  
teach me to live . . .  
give me the strength  
to try . . .  
_

But of course, she was gone. This would be the last time he would see her, so he had to make it count. He just, _had _to. If this didn't work… well, he may never be able to rest well again.

_No more memories,  
no more silent tears . . .  
No more gazing across  
the wasted years . . ._

The soft hum of the TARDIS comforted him as he took his sonic to his mouth. Even if it was only one word, she'd know who it was. She wouldn't think it was voices in her head, she'd know that he was calling to her… she would know to follow the voice.

He bit on his lower lip, knowing that this was going to be hard. What if the gap closed before he ever saw her again? What if the universes collapsed because something went wrong? Or maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't work at all, and the Doctor would be doomed to himself.

He didn't want to fool her, to make her think that they were going to be together again, because they weren't. They never will be able to… all because of his lousy mistake. She'd think he was saying "hello" by that one word, she'd think they could start all over again.

Finally, it came out of his mouth, in a low, hushed tone. His voice sounded more confident than he thought it would as he whispered that one word that was so important.

"Rose." It wasn't a start, oh no, he hoped Rose knew that it was more of a, well…

_Help me say  
goodbye.

* * *

_**There's the chap! :) If u have any requests for songs and scenes, please let me know in ur comment or a PM! :) Please review even if its just a "hey" or a "good job"! :)  
**


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